Bicycle Built for Speed

I got a new road bike for my birthday and yesterday I broke it in. First of all, let me explain that a bike used for racing and those huge, mammoth bike rides are not like the bikes we ride as kids nor are they the bike you run up to Wal-mart and get for a little ride around the neighborhood. They are specifically for your height and inseam and they are designed so that you have to reach as faaaaar as your little arms will go to get to the brakes and gear shifts! Not only that, but they expect you to wear shoes with cleats to lock in your feet!

What the heck is that all about!?

My first attempt to get on the bike was just that. An attempt. I failed to get my leg thrown over the thing because the seat was too high. Got that adjusted and then I have to attempt to get a foot on the pedal, and locked in, and take off. Easier said than done. When you're standing on the ground, your seat comes to just right above your butt crack so it's not like you can just sit down and take off. Nope. You have to get one foot on and stand up to get on your seat (gotta get rolling too or you will fall and keep in mind your foot is locked in and if you start to fall you have to not forget to snap your shoe out of the pedal to catch yourself) and throw the other foot into locked position. Start pedaling!

I walked my bike to a safe area to get started. You know, the area on the bottom of the hill, past the poles (so I wont hit them), where hopefully no one can see me try to take a ride. Monday's at 6pm are busy on the trails! I managed to take off and with only a little struggle on the second cleat, I was off and riding!

I rode 12 miles on my first day with no accidents. I didn't wreck or run over anyone or get run over. I did a little off-roading by accident, but nothing major. I managed to maintain control of the vehicle at all times!

Today, I rode another 12 miles in horrid wind... and my butt bone hurts like no other! It was sore from yesterday, but today its major sore. Is there a treatment for that? Bike Butt!

A Little R & R

I don't specifically adore Rachel Ray, but I don't dislike her either. She is a cute girl that has this raspy voice like she just left a smokey bar (all night long). But have you noticed how fluffy her arms are? She's not fat by any means... but her arms are huge!

Most girls gain weight in their arse. I think her yummy dishes go straight to her arms!

You Make Me Sick

For the past few months, I've sat at my computer desk with my back to the District Manager's office and I hear every little conversation that takes place. Whether I like it or not. I've grown more and more irritated with his immaturity and lack of direction and irresponsibility.

He is constantly picking up the phone and calling someone to see if they want to go get drunk. He calls other DM's or agents and calls them dirty names and then giggles. Today, he called someone and told them about an agent (female obviously) that made X amount of sales and won an award and "damn she had this low cut blouse on that made her, well they, it was low cut and blah blah" *cleared his throat*... was probably sportin' a woody just talking about it.

He's a grandpa for God's sakes. Plus we're supposed to be professional and who knows who's listening!?!? There might be a place and time for that kind of thing but not all the time. And its all the time with him. I grow more and more tired of it.

Whether Weather

Ok, this severe weather nonsense is getting old fast. It’s only April 9^th and I think we’ve had five or six tornado watches in the last few weeks and we haven’t even hit the big twister month (May) yet. This is not boding well. It’s especially entertaining when the fronts move through during the early morning hours and all that crashing and booming wakes you up from a dead sleep debating whether to head for the storm shelter (aka wine cellar) or not. Last month, I finally broke down and purchased a weather radio so I’ll know how things stand should the power go off. Several more rounds are expected today and tomorrow with the likeliest chance of terrible twisters predicted to hit during the *shocked look* early morning hours. Oh joy! Kerbear is under a severe thunderstorm watch as I type and I’m certain I’ll come under it later today. I sure hope this extensive renovation on Chaos College isn’t all for naught.

The Topfive.com's 16 Signs Your Website Is Not Very 2.0

16. Yours in the only Website where communities can get
communicable diseases.

15. "This site best viewed with Mosaic Browser."

14. Your source code contains the statement: "Charles
Babbage 1830"

13. Your "social networking" site is nothing but a single
page with a long list of phone numbers.

12. Your hamsters are doing the minuet.

11. Instead of streaming video, your site sends someone
to the user's location with a slide projector.

10. You had to suspend your blog when your blanket caught
fire on the hot smoke.

9. Your highest browser penetration: WebTV 1.0.

8. The "Order now!" link next to merchandise brings up
a simple text page displaying a phone number.

7. “CDIV Fyle Nae Founde."

6. Your site just sits there yelling at the Web 2.0 sites
to GET THE HELL OFF ITS INTERNET!

5. The only thing that's user-generated: cease-and-desist
letters.

4. Instead of uploading an avatar, the user is asked to
approximate his or her look in "ASCII art" using a 30x30
matrix of Courier New characters.

3. Language options are limited to Latin and Sanskrit.

2. The sample MP3s on the site are skipping.

1. Your corporate blog's editorial this week rails at
"Congreff."

Coweringly,
Circe

My Surprise Birthday!

OHHHH!!!! Guess what I got for my birthday!!?!??!?! A road bike! I'm so excited!

Richard and my sis and my parents got me a bike (and intend on me using it)... PLUS I'm registered for RAGBRAI. It's a 500 mile, 7 day bike ride across the state of Iowa.

I'm officially in the "in" bike rider group here and start training this next week I hope! This means long, treacherous rides several times a week. Plus, wearing pants with butt pads. HAHAHAH

My Name Is...

I really love our daycare lady that keeps Z. She's got flare and sparkling personality and her husband is a jewel too. The kids she keeps are all such good kids... hilarious and very well mannered. Last week I walked in the front door of daycare and I heard "Header, can we have a snack!?"

Header: NO! The kitchen is closed.

Two little boys running around at her feet... each about 3 years old.

Boys: No it's not Header! Can we have a snack?!

Header: NO boys! The kitchen is closed. Go in the other room i'm cleaning up.

Boys: Its not closed Header, cuz we're in it.

Me: LAUGHING HYSTERICALLY Did they call you Header!?

Header: Yep. I get called Header, Ma, Hannah, or Hey and I answer to all of it.

Her name is Heather! LMAO

Make Me Feel Better

Richard and I went to our sunday school social tonight. We've only been to two in two years and for some reason I felt like we needed to go to this one.

I'm glad we did! I've been toying with issues at my new job and not sure what to do or which way to go and tonight I had three people come and ask me about work and "how is it going" and all three of them told me things that confirmed how I was feeling and what direction I needed to take all this.

Funny how things work out like that. I needed to be there to hear what my fellow classmates had to say.

Surely You Jest

Let’s see. March ended and April began much like an angry, ferocious lion by throwing tornados at us. This was followed by April Fool’s Day but my merry band of IT warriors were too busy getting ready for the academic contest we hosted on Wednesday to do much about it. And even though I’ve been minus parts of my group on various days, things have managed to stay hectic this entire workweek. Throw in Chaos College electing a new prez (though this won't take effect until July) to replace our departing Grand Poobah, and you can understand why busy is an understatement around here. Ch-ch-ch-changes, eh? Things are picking up speed as many events preface the grand finale better known as Commencement. And this culmination of educated toil and sweat arrives about a week early this semester.

I’m totally hooked on http://www.cracked.com/ and if you hear loud peals of laughter emanating from my end of the building, this is the reason why. Happy weekend! :)

Errbody in Da House Gettin Tipsy

It's rainy and cold today! Isn't it April and supposed to be spring!?!??

I just left the dermatologists office. I've had this funky itchy rash on my hands the past month or so and he's been treating it so today was my checkup.

He told me that I had to destress. He said stress is hurting me and if my hands are showing signs, that means my entire body is having problems. He then asked what could be causing me stress. Well... I have a new baby and a new job. I can't destress that stuff. lol He said "do you have an Au Pair" *insert hysterical laughter here*

No. I do it myself.

He said "you need to talk to hubby and tell him it's time to get an Au Pair"

Again hysterical laughter to myself.

Then he followed with I probably need to make a job change.

This job change IS my job change! So change from my change!?!? That might be possible. Heck it might be necessary. After today, I was considering it anyways.

Then he asked if he could help by giving me Prozac. As lovely as the thought is... I declined. I need to learn to relax and help myself... myself! I dont want to depend on a pill. Even though its a tiny dose, I dont want to become dependant. I'll just drink myself silly instead. I think I'll enjoy that treatment more.

Margarita's anyone!?!?

Twister

A tornado hit our area last night. Not too far from my house. So close I could almost spit on it and not one time did the sirens go off. We stayed up pretty late last night watching the weather and seeing what was expected. The storms were pretty brutal but it was going to swing around us and we'd probably only get some wind and rain.. maybe a little hail but nothing super major.

We headed off to bed and about an 1 1/2 hours later, Richard got up and flipped on the weather again. Nothing. The weather guy had nothing catastrophic to talk about and seemed the worst was over.

This morning we got up and as part of our normal routine we turn on the news and see what we're faced with for the day and I'll be darn if a tornado didn't wipe out a house and tear up a few other houses less than a mile from us! Seriously!! Its just right over there! *pointing* In fact, two major roads within a mile from our house were shut down today due to storm damage and OG&E was working on it all day.

I asked Richard if the sirens had gone off. He didn't hear them. I didn't hear them. All day long I'd bump into people and they'd ask "did you hear sirens?" Nope. Not one. Neither did anyone else. We grew pissed at our city for not warning us! We figured they spent all their siren fund in testing and couldn't actually blow them in the event of a real situation because we've spent our wad testing every saturday at noon!

Tonight on the news the little weather guy explained. The storm was right over and us and out of nowhere (obviously) a tornado drops on those houses. No warning... nothing. The families all hid in bathrooms and closets. No one was hurt, thankfully.

It occured at the exact time Richard hopped out of bed to watch the weather. Weird!!!

Lost Lingerie

Did someone misplace their trusty binder? I discovered this on the counter by the sink in the gym, crumpled and despondent, whimpering in the corner. Its owner apparently had dressed in such a rush that this helpless undergarment was overlooked in the frantic scramble. Here’s hoping it was later reclaimed and is once again back in commission.

The federal government is sending each and every one of us a $600 rebate. If we spend that money at Wal-Mart, the money will go to China. If we spend it on gasoline it will go to the Arabs. If we purchase a computer it will go to India. If we purchase fruit and vegetables it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala. If we purchase a good car it will go to Japan. If we purchase useless crap it will go to Taiwan and none of it will help the American economy. The only way to keep that money here at home is to buy prostitutes and beer, since these are the only products still produced in the US. Thank you for your help.

Cat a Tonic

Earlier this week my favorite furball experienced a ‘digestive tract upset’ (aka puked) involving worms. TBC apprised me of his predicament and asked me to pick up a supply of worm meds from the vet for all our four-legged children. This I did Monday after work. Administering the pills was quite entertaining as our multiple cat household received their dosage via Dr TBC. Though my role was not as crucial, I did play the part of the encouraging yet distant onlooker nurse. I did miss Stubbly’s turn on the table but was present for the others. My preshus BW was next up and the timid little guy was left quite traumatized but managed to hide his humiliation by wolfing down the wet cat food TBC offered as a consolation prize for playing. I cringed when Spikey’s turn came as she is anything but a model patient and is widely known as the Witch Queen. Anyway, TBC grabbed her by the head, popped open her jaw and slung the little pill into her unwilling mouth. Apparently that sucker traveled a little further than expected and got stuck in her airway causing her to make weird noises and froth profusely. After a minute of consternation and debate, TBC hunted her down hiding under the sofa and heimliched her to where the stubborn tablet finished its original journey down her esophagus. Whew! She too was severely distressed and hid under the corner of the bar, refusing to even consider the tempting plate of kitty treats. Our final feline patient was our feisty female newbie, Cami, who was quite the little trooper and faced her fate with stoic resolve. Later that evening, I headed down the hallway only to discover hacked up clumps of undigested dinner in not one but three huge piles scattered across the carpet. Gross! Grumbling loudly, I cleaned up the wretched mess and questioned the efficacy of giving the puker anything remotely resembling edibles a nanosecond after he’s been dosed, but then, who am I to question the knowledgeable, educated doctor? And speaking of BW, does that sweet snoozing lump of love resemble a ruthless brawler who beat up the neighbor cat so badly they required an IV? I must have a serious talk with that boy…

Birthday Party

I wish I had total freedom to write and write and write sometimes (here). But I don't. You never know who might stumble onto this blog plus I have a few friends that read it periodically... although probably more like once every six months... but this would be the one time in that six months they'd decide to read and it's a post about them. Not cool. So, I will keep my mouth shut (for now) ;)

The less detailed version is...

Last night we had a surprise birthday party for my sister! For some reason she didn't act too happy. hmmmm
Her BF asked Jill and I to arrange it... and we did. We also threw in a little surprise for him. His BD is two days before hers, so I called a few of his friends and invited them and had a cake for both of them.

Her friend Dawna came to pay a visit...


Birthday girl jabbering with someone...


Jill loving on my hubby and precious baby!


The cake (hers)...


I feel something is/was amiss... darn, I wish I could write more!

Sneezin Season

So I’m back online after a brief sabbatical. Ya gotta love how consistently inconsistent I’ve become with blogging. Must be something about getting close to that third year mark, eh? Don't forget to mark your calendars for July 6th as Kerbear and I would love to receive lots of fabulous presents. (We promise to act surprised.)
: -)


The last few weeks I’ve been sneezing. A lot. I don’t recall ever having this miserable of a time with allergies. As I’ve never been officially tested, I’m going to take an educated guess and say it’s the budding trees causing my sniffling woes. I understand cedars might be the most likely culprit and I’d also venture a guess that having the problematic devils line both sides of our driveway is not a plus. Of course, the Okie wind doesn’t help matters because if we are blessed with a warm, springlike day, it’s a given it will go hand in hand with Mr. Gusty Breezes. All I know is I’m helping put the tissue companies, usually the Puffs people, decisively in the black for their profit margins. Ah, Spring in Oklahoma—tissues and tornadoes!

Don't Eat the Chocolate Jelly Beans

Happy Easter!!!

It's been nice all week and today it's supposed to be pretty nippy. Just like spring break, the weather gods know when it's going to be Easter and they make it cold. Every year. Yet every year, the fashion designers make little thin, strappy, Easter dresses to be worn with cute little white sandals, when in reality we need to be wearing sweaters and boots!

Enjoy your day!

Would You Like Some Fries With That?

This morning I stopped by Sonic to quickly grab a little breakfast and out with my French Toast Sticks came two containers of syrup (yes, you read that right). They never give two... and some ketchup.

Why ketchup?

I might could understand ranch because ranch goes with everything (ask my kids)... but ketchup!?

The Irish are Coming!

Happy St Patty's Day to ya!

It's kind of a dark, wet, dreary day here in the heart of the USA. What a crappy way to start spring break.

I've never understood why they have "spring" break in March when it's almost always (99.99%) likely to be cold and nasty. I can't really recall a nice spring break. Ever. I do remember having an ice storm though! I remember snow on spring break too. I don't remember 'springy' weather. Ever.

Why don't they move spring break to be a week or two later? I know that it wouldn't really be in the middle of the academic semester, but it would probably be nicer weather.

Oh. and Heather Mills pisses me off. Just looking at her makes me irrate. If Paul would give me 50 million, I'd be a happy little camper.

A Day at the Spa

I wondered why Heather's face was all dolled up when I got to her house to pick baby Z up. She usually wears really light makeup and she even had this deep brick red lipstick on. She looked like she was fixing to go on stage or something.

"We played Beauty Shop today, and Z got her toes painted".



They are cute little pink nails too! How someone could sit and so steadily paint such a tiny moving target is beyond me!

Baby Got Back

Baby Z rolled over last night!

C put her down on her jungle gym mat to play and walked off towards the kitchen. He turned back to check on her and she flipped right on over!

She jabbers and giggles and flirts with us and is now rolling over (back to front). She's growing up so quickly! I've already packed away a big set of clothes that she's outgrown. I took one last peek at them before I neatly folded them and shoved them in the bag and thought "gosh, I remember when she was that tiny and wore this". It was just a few weeks/months ago! lol

Acting Like Schoolgirls

I can't remember if I've mentioned this before or not. You know sometimes you think about things so much that you honestly think you've talked about it (or blogged it) and all along it's been only in your mind.

I don't like the Today Show so much since Katie left and Meredith is on. It's not that I don't like Meredith.... it's that I don't particularly care for her on the Today Show. I'm not real hip on the dynamics. It seems like to me that Matt is always trying to stay on track and 'run' from the female co-hosts but they are always giggling and flirting and getting off track. I've even seen them grab him and giggle... hanging onto him... and he'd break away and try to seriously get the show going while they'd still be giggling and cracking up.

It was joking and loose when Katie was co-anchoring with Matt, but she didn't lead you to believe she wanted in his pants and at whatever cost. Plus, she didn't stand like a man. That drives me nuts to.