Thursday, July 27, 2006
Bumper Cars
I had a wreck.
I shouldn't have worked late today... had I left at my normal time I would have avoided this yo-yo who wasnt paying attention and all would be good. But NOOOO I am a devoted employee and I had things I needed to get done that I didnt want waiting until tomorrow, so I stayed. Traffic was moving along at its normal 70-75mph but in the fast lane was a slow moving truck. So, I moved out to the slow lane, passed him and went on my way. About a mile down the highway, it suddenly goes from a 4 lane to a 2 lane and traffic comes to a stand-still due to the single lanes and a traffic light. I had moved to the single lane and was completely stopped behind a truck when in a split second I looked up in my mirror and I saw this blue truck in my rear view mirror. And I mean he was literally in my mirror it seemed like. Before it could register that 'he's going to hit me'... he'd hit me. The crash was horrifyingly loud. He shoved me into the truck in front of me... and then him into the car in front of him.
After I regained composure, I grabbed my phone and called 911. I got out to check on the guy in front of me... he got out to check on us. Everyone seemed fine, except the dude in the very back... that ran into me. He didnt get out... and remained in his truck for the 35 minutes it took police officers to respond to the call. Thank goodness we have 911! Gee... just imagine how long we'd have to wait if I had to call the real phone number. The girl in the very front (little car) even took off. She decided it wasnt worth the wait. While waiting I got to chatting with the guy that I hit, and it turns out he's an attorney. Civil law... we had alot to discuss to pass the time :)So now I have a crunched up vehicle - front and back. Good news - the dude was insured.
Photos
Here's a couple of our pictures that some of my buddies have emailed me about. Richard's family wanted some pictures of us, so we spent a saturday afternoon with a photographer and did lots of fun stuff. We did formal to casual and a few I won't post here. ;) We took 3 or 4 changes of clothes and drove about 30 miles from home. When we got to the photographer... we realized we'd left my little black dress laying over the back of the couch. So, Richard drove allll the way back home (while i had my hair done) to get my dress. He's so sweet...
It's Like a Heatwave
Greetings and salutations from the bowels of hell. Yes gang, though we are far from alone, Okiedokieland is experiencing some serious, steaming blasts of blistering air as we head toward August. This mixture of hot, dry, and windy occurs every summer so it should come as no surprise to residents but it’s still annoying and makes us miserable. In my case I felt, to use a technical term, ‘yucky’ for the past week and finally gave in and visited the doctor. Much to my dismay, I was informed I had allergies and very possibly the culprit was dust. Great. Dust. Like I can do much about that most common of all substances. Anyway, he prescribed allergy meds and while they worked just dandy yesterday, they had the nasty downside of keeping me tossing and turning ALL night resulting in one blonde zombie this morning. The Grand Poohbah is out of the office for a few days but the second-in-command still called an abbreviated council. I glowered menacingly from my desk and when a certain fat, lazyass, POS female slacker (who will remain nameless) had the utter gall to ask if I had to take notes for every meeting I lost it and loudly informed the assembled gang I was NOT doing it today!!! As they all collectively thought, “Circe’s in one hell of a mood,” no one dared speak to the contrary.
I’m trying to think what exciting everyday adventures our precious readers have missed concerning your Metal Fly trio. Being unable to post caused untold suffering, sorrow and consternation resulting in serious blog withdrawals so we are delighted to be back amongst our witty-fingered friends. In conclusion, (said in best Michael Jackson falsetto,) “We love you all!”
The Topfive.com’s Ten Signs You've Hired the Wrong Magician
Begins by saying his first trick "relies on the magic of sweet, sweet love."
His biggest trick? Converting a sixer of Coors into "liquid gold" -- eventually.
Smoke emanating from more than just the fingertips of The Magnificent Flatulo.
Before every trick, tells hostess, "For this one I'm going to need to borrow your bra."
Her "magic words" after sawing a volunteer in half? “Ohshitohshitohshit!!"
During intermission, she made your 15-year-old son's virginity disappear.
All of his "tricks" are written in C++.
Keeps telling your daughter, "It's not the size of the wand that matters, it's the magic in it."
His version of "The Disappearing Dove" requires a can of Crisco and a latex glove.
Sure, the rabbit-from-the-beret thing was cute, but the Great Lewinsky's "Magic Stain" trick was downright gross.
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