Punch This

My sis and I went to a kickboxing class tonite. Its not the same one I went to a month or so ago. This is a new one. I showed up to class on time and they had already started. I walked in and the room is full of people running about. One half is running from wall to wall... the other is doing jumping jacks. I spy sis and she (very breathy) whispers... run! I just stood there... what? She repeats... run!!! I threw my stuff on the floor and I hear, from some faint voice up front, join us in the front. I turn and the leader chick of this class is the cute little oriental/white chick! Again, Grant would love to be in my shoes. She's built like a shit brickhouse with the cutest little sparkling personality. She isnt a tiny little 'oh my gosh i might break her' girl... she's got some meat/muscle on her. Looks totally awesome.

I ran up front and started in on my jumping jacks... then she screams 'switch!' We all rotate and I find myself running those laps. This was just the warmup.

We kicked and punched and kicked to front, side and back, punched some more. I had sweat dripping in my eyes and sweaty nasty hair flinging about. She then instructs us to put our boxing gloves on and position ourselves with our punching bags. I noticed this faint smell of... ass. I wasnt sure if someone farted or if someone had on moldy clothes or what... but I didnt want to make a scene 'oh my gawd! what is that rank smell!' So I followed suit and began punching and kicking the bag. I pictured different people I'd like to be standing in front of me as I punched... I looked over at my sis and just smiled and said "you remember that time when we were young and you put your jolly rancher on my alarm clock?!"... then i punched. HARD. That was a great workout!

Off with the gloves... then I could smell ass even more! I lifted my hands and took a sniff. ASS! Its all over my hands! I stuck my hands in ass-gloves! My stomach churned. I leaned over to sis and asked her if her hands smell. Certainly... I bet we all did. It was like I had put nasty sweaty athletic shoes on my hands. I had Athletes Hands! Smelly, nasty, sweaty, ass hands. As soon as this class was over I made a bee-line for the bathroom and coated them in the industrial strength antibacterial soap.

That is nasty! It was like someone had taken a poo and I wiped their ass with my hand. Using NO toilet paper! ugh! There has got to be a better plan for that... I guess I might need to invest in my own boxing gloves.

Grant: Another one I'll try to get her picture, website, phone number... something for you. She's really sweet...