Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Drowned Rat

It’s raining yet again and indeed the heavens poured forth during the drive time to work leaving me surveying my personal damage. There’s nothing quite like juggling a massive tote, though it does at least have a zipper, a cutesy purse (no zipper or snap), and an ungainly travel umbrella as I clop my way to the building. Of course nothing spurs on a quick burst of speed like an ominous clap of thunder smack dab in the middle of my already hurried trek. However, it’s not the external water that did the damage though I am sporting a large, lovely wet spot on the side of my pants. It seems my water bottle lid came loose and decided to shower the contents of the tote with an unexpected bath. I detected muffled sobs coming from the bowels of the water-logged contraption and pulled out my drenched lighthouse-façaded planner looking bedraggled, battered, and abused. Most of the items can take any weather-related incidents but obviously not the paper-laden planner or the notes I had tossed in just this morning with insurance info and numbers. I would pick today of all days to give them a ring thus hoping to employ my best powers of persuasion in changing their rigid stance on a particular bone of contention. Fortunately I can easily find those digits again and recall my plan of strategy for presenting my side, but I think I may wait for a more opportune time...

I don’t know how many of you read "Dear Prudence" or "Ask Miss Manners" but the problems are usually darn entertaining and it's fun to hear how these experts present their solutions. One I recently read was so hilarious that I felt the need to share it:

Dear Prudence,
I am one of five women at my office. Roughly three out of five mornings, the one man we work with spends the first 10 to 15 minutes of the day in the (single, shared) bathroom. We work in a small office where we need to be available to any current or potential clients who call or drop in, so it does affect the rest of us if someone disappears mysteriously since, obviously, he doesn't announce that he's heading off to the can. I feel that if something is happening on such a regular basis, he should be able to take care of it at home before he comes to work. (He has only a half-hour commute.) My two-part question for you is: Is it worth saying something to him about it? And, presumably this would be a job for our manager, but what would be the best way of going about this? She usually hasn't arrived by that point in the morning, and so is not aware of this tendency.

Waiting for the Can

Dear Waiting,
How would you approach this with your manager? "Sue, I believe Dick starts his day with a bowel movement at the office. Could you please tell him to coordinate his bodily functions better so we don't have to cover for him for the first 10 minutes of work?" Maybe you could talk to Dick and tell him that if he's going to be doing something beside No. 1, he should announce it so the rest of you can plan your morning accordingly. Or maybe Dick is in the bathroom checking his insulin, maybe he has irritable bowel syndrome, or maybe it's hard to imagine that there is anything more inappropriate for you to say anything to anyone about.

Prudie

4 comments:

CruiserMel said...

Awwwww, so rank! Men can be so gross. AND they think nothing of taking reading material with them! Blech.

Also, is Oklahoma wet enough, YET? Seems whenever I check in here, it's another story about rain. Maybe those Indians up there need to quit the rain dancing!

Oh and btw, you've been tagged. Come to my blog and look one or two entries down. Ha ha, you can't catch me!

Traveling Chica said...

ROFL

Ok, that little rat was kinda cute :)

Circe said...

Cruiser, boss just told me we are in the water bucket ALL NEXT WEEK also. *groans* I think you've hit on the crux of the problem though! It's those Indians and their frantic rain dances and it's gotten completely out of control. *LOL*
And I'll accept your tagging and blog about it today... :)

TC, I thought that rat was cute too. :)

thephoenixnyc said...

One great thing about being a man is we don't carry "totes" or "cutesy purses"