Wednesday, March 14, 2007

Drop a Bomb

A few years ago I ran around with a girl who was a Funeral Home Director. We'd probably still be running around, but men got in the way. (She ran off to another town and got married... never to be seen again!) Anyways... during our friendship (we're still friends, we just don't get to see each other much because life is demanding) I learned a ton of things about death and the human body that probably a teeny tiny percentage of the real world know and the rest don't care to know. Some things are just gross!

The one thing i've always remembered was the poop talk. She told me that people can typically be carrying up to ten pounds of pooh in their bowels and you'd be amazed at how much they see when they are working on bodies.

So that makes me think. Wrestlers, when trying to make weight, take laxatives to clean out their system which helps them shed a few pounds. They pull on sweat suits and run in steamy showers to sweat off a few ounces. What about flatulance? If you can poop and drop a couple of pounds... what about when you rip a big toot? Do you drop weight then? When you're all gassy your stomach swells and then when you pass it (top or bottom) your stomach is relieved and the bubble reduces. So does that mean a few ounces (or pounds depending on how fart-ridden you are!) lost?

These are thoughts I ponder at 6am while standing (still asleep) in the shower...

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

It would have to depend on the moisture content, since liquids are much heavier than gases. Therefore, people wanting to lose weight should pray for wet ones.

Kerry said...

Good point!

Anonymous said...

I think maybe you just shouldn't think in the shower anymore...

;-)

Mrs. S. said...

So I'm one bm short of backin' into an old wardrobe...

Kerry said...

Chica: thats where my greatest thoughts and evil plans occur! lol That's my 'quiet thinking place'. :)
and... I cant help but think there. The thoughts just roll...

Burg: YES!!! Pooh and you can drop a dress size! :)

Big Ben said...

I carry about 2 or 3 punds of gas on a regular basis I would guess. I would like to fart it all out at once, that would be cool.

Kerry said...

Ben: That makes me sing the song "you dropped a bomb on me, baby..... you dropped a bomb on me!"

I think its from the 80's :)